Tried your idea of 20 press-ups after going for a leak. OK at home, but when I was in town I did in a public loo. My bell-end got stuck in a grating in the floor. I heaved and pulled and was amazed to see how far a shaft will stretch....its incredibly elastic.... must have been 30 cms or more, but alas no joy. Used my mobile, got out a paramedic. Mid twenties and blond. She heaved and pulled, but made things worse. It swelled up...I don't know why. Then she pulled a tube of Durex lube from her pocket....why does she carry that I wondered. Anyway, she rubbed it liberally over the trapped end and the whole lot shot back out like a bungee and clobbered my plums. It made my eyes water and she interpreted that as gratitude. After my injured tackle was finally put back safely in my boxers she asked what the hell I had been doing. All I could tell her was the truth, that I was a surfer and was trying to boost my pecs like my Great Uncle Scoot does. She then said " Oh well, you and your Great Uncle had better keep this, then" and she gave me her tube 'o' lube.

I'll tell you what else isn't hot - losing everything you wrote all afternoon for a blog post just because some pesky sprayer logs in from another computer.... eh Skel? Well done BTW